• Nick Pennman

Planned Parenthood sues fetus for defamation:

BOSTON – Alexis Johnson, acting president of Planned Parenthood has today filed a defamation suit against the yet to be named fetus of local dress maker, Tiffany Smith.

Smith posted a sonogram of her ten-week-old fetus last week with the caption: “I wonder what she’s thinking?”

The outraged Planned Parenthood CEO claimed, “The post tried to give human traits to something that isn’t human. This has the potential to make millions of women question their decision to abort their children”.

While a precedent for such a case hasn’t been met, experts suggest the yet to be named fetus will be destined for the courtroom, shortly after birth. The fetus was unavailable for comment.