• Nick Pennman

James Woods: The only celebrity without Covid.

U.S.— James Woods fronted the press today to shed light only why he is the only celebrity who hasn't contracted Covid-19.

"There are afew factors. First of all, I'm a conservative, so naturally I avoid making things up for attention". Newly hired reporter for CNN, Frenchman Juicy Smollett nodded in agreement. "Then there's the fact that no ones paid me to contract it yet". The Bugles own Nick Pennman was able to disprove this fact speaking with a Mr @Will Bates on Twitter: "We made an offer but Mr Woods deemed it too low". James ended the press conference with a two fingered salute before jumping into his 1964 Porsche 365C and speeding from the scene. Unsatisfied with his answers, headlines have turned to the carbon footprint of Mr. Woods automobile.